Justice
League Unlimited
Kids' Stuff
Original Airdate - 08/14/04
I had this theory that Cartoon Network wanted
a Justice League that could be ported more easily over to
Kids WB! On Saturday mornings, as they've done with Teen
Titans. Five minutes into "Kids' Stuff," it seemed confirmed.
What a fantasy, making the world's greatest superheroes
into pre-teens. And then the show gets a Twilight Zone
twist ending that should cause nightmares in small children
for weeks. If they understand it.
Not that bringing back Morgaine LeFay (Olivia
D'abo) to plague the League is really stuff for kids, anyway.
Her cold, Kirby-esque design hints that she must be truly
hideous beneath the mask. Her son Mordred may be a beautiful
boy ("where did I go wrong?" she opines), he is definitely
ugly on the inside. Upon seizing an amulet commanding "the
first magic," Mordred turns on his mother, declaring a world
with "no one older than me."
His dream world without adults, it, too,
is pretty dark stuff, transforming Disneyland (or something
close to it) into the deep dark woods from pre-Disney fairy
tales.
Whether you want to read commentary into
this or not, notice that the boys don't seem to have any
problem with this. Moreover, they willingly follow their
new boy king and gleefully scoop up the anime-influenced
action figures he creates for them. Only girls seem to ask
for practical things, such as food for baby sisters.
That transfers over to the League as well.
Transported to a nether-realm, the four core members strike
a bargain with Le Fay to become children again and stop
Mordred. Green Lantern and Superman become very excitable
youngsters, though John Stewart has a horrible moment when
he realizes that he needed glasses as a child. In a look
ahead to Kyle Rayner, the ring morphs his glowing green
geek specs into a much sleeker mask with corrective lenses.
Though slightly more impulsive than his
adult self, Batboy remains grim and determined. Also pretty
much immune to the flirtations of Wonder Girl, which begs
the question: have I missed something? Are Batman and Wonder
Woman building a relationship on this show? Clearly, a pre-teen
Bruce Wayne has no time for it, with Kyle Alcazar doing
a good job of imitating Kevin Conroy's rasp - "what-EVER!"
when Diana tries flirting.
It may be Bruce's planning that saves the
day, but it is Wonder Girl, voiced by uber-child star Dakota
Fanning, that makes sure everything happens. At every turn
of the plot, she takes command, either by shaming unruly
children or bossing them around.
She can calm the inexplicable baby Etrigan,
a character bearing a suspicious behavioral resemblance
to Disney's Stitch. Actually, he shouldn't exist at all,
and the episode offers no explanation as to why The Demon
would have de-aged instead of being banished to limbo. Chalk
it up to his being a natural enemy of Mordred, and try not
to ask so many questions or wish that we had a full hour
to clear this up.
It's hard to compare this episode to previous
ones, as the bulk of the acting was done by people completely
new to the franchise. "Kids' Stuff" does move some character
dynamics along with this Batman/Wonder Woman pairing, and
does remain true to the basics of both. For some reason,
Green Lantern seems a lot more imaginative as a child, and
that may resonate later on when Kyle appears.
Even
though Etrigan established himself as an ally in "A
Knight of Shadows" on the old show, it's odd to see
how casually the League treats him. Come on, people, he's
still The Demon! As an adult he has only one spoken line,
and that hints that he's also a lot more playfully demonic
than he was in his previous appearance.
With Justice League Unlimited having
the promise of almost anyone in the DC Universe showing
up, it's a little disappointing to burn an episode finishing
up business from the old series. Though somewhat entertaining,
we've been there.
Michael's Continuity Corner
Over the two seasons of Justice League, Batman and
Wonder Woman have flirted but the Green Lantern/Hawkgirl
romance always took front seat. It will probably never happen
(yes, Dwayne McDuffie, I'm challenging you). Batman is wound
too tightly and Wonder Woman is a total tease. At best you
could make Justice League Elite writer Joe Kelly's
argument that they sometimes do it just to release tension,
a concept that is totally hot.
If
you liked this childish plotline, check out JLA: "World
Without Grownups" by Todd Dezago. (Link helpfully provided)
Same concept, but more enjoyable.
Which
character should be popping up on JLU? We've got a poll
on the forums, or add your own!
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