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Creature
Unknown
As legend
and a DVD extra featurette has it, Eric
Mittleman accidentally got ahold of some strange brownies
in Jamaica and began seeing Lizard Men running around. Here
at Fanboy Planet, we suspect brownies had nothing to do
with it, but that's just our personal belief in actual Lizard
Men. Anyway, the event inspired Mittleman to write a script
about a Lizard Man, which when merged with some ideas from
Scott Zakarin became the basis for this week's monster in
the woods entry, Creature Unknown.
Lest you think that a dismissive description,
think again. There's a certain art to making an effective
creature movie, and first-time director Michael Burnett
has it down. Of course, his years working on special make-up
effects himself helped him get that rhythm.
Start
off with a tastefully done slaughter that establishes brief
glimpses of your monster. Have a fun title sequence that
gets the monster's origin largely out of the way (done here
by Evan Unruh and Mark Teague, the credits sequence has
a sense of fun, and in conjunction with Burnett's direction
does a concise job). Bring your cast of pretty young things
to a remote cabin, and don't wait too long before picking
them off one by one. Make sure to include a couple of gory
money shots that make your reviewer regret he was eating
lunch while watching this.
Most importantly, even though your creature
may be a man in a foam rubber suit, do your best to make
it a good one. And Burnett did indeed make it a good one,
a monster reminiscent of the Creature From The Black Lagoon,
but with much more expressiveness. When the full reveal
comes, it is not disappointing in the least.
For
the most part, neither is the plot. Mittleman and Zakarin
tried for something a little deeper than the usual monster
movie trope, mixing in what would have been an intriguing
psychological drama on its own.
A group
of post-graduates gather to commemorate their high school
prom night, when Steve (Chris Hoffman) lost his identical
twin Wes (Matt Hoffman). Lost is the operative word, because
even though we see a scene upfront of Wes bleeding and in
pain, his body was never found. In a horror movie, that
never bodes well.
The
prom night tragedy created a schism among the otherwise
tightly-knit group of friends, and their reunion four years
later plays out with a lot of understandable awkwardness.
It seems that mostly they swallowed their pain and tacitly
agreed to ignore each other. Unfortunately, that seems a
little hard to swallow as an audience, especially as some
deep-seated emotional arcs bubble to the surface.
Why
would Steve cut all ties to girlfriend Amanda (the beautiful
Maggie Grace), except to serve the plot and yes, deepen
the mystery? As a slasher version of The Big Chill,
this group doesn't quite have the distance from their youth
to really give their regrets much resonance.
What does hit the mark, though, is in the
newcomer to their group, Ally (Kristin Herold). She dates
Sean (John Keyser), the obligatory obnoxious jock of the
peers whom she met on a reality dating show. (Ironically,
Keyser himself is currently on a reality show, competing
to be the "Next Action Star.") The two claim to be "engaged,"
but not the kind of engaged that involves a ring. Or really
much that involves commitment. Ally comes across as the
most real precisely because her character is the most naked
about her shallowness. Also, her character is the most naked.
As a couple, Sean and Ally provide the
most entertainment, again because their motivations are
right out there to see. Herold and Keyser also seem to be
having the most fun in their roles, which makes it a shame
that as the sex mad twosome, you know they're marked for
death. Hey, there are rules to these things.
Coming
a close second to Herold and Keyser, Chase
Masterson deservedly gets top billing as the wild card
in the whole thing, the not-quite-mad scientist Katt. We
meet her first, actually, dressed in leathers, in an unsuccessful
bid to hunt the creature that we all know she had a hand
in creating. Masterson plays tough arrogance well, with
perhaps a touch too much seriousness about the whole thing.
Then again, she's the one with the gun. Who's going to argue?
The
DVD includes a blooper reel, an extra that has become pretty
standard, but always seems weird with a horror movie. However,
the cast and crew behind the scenes documentary is pretty
good, especially with Mittleman's candor about his inspiration
and his excitement about the project. Burnett also offers
a look at the process of building a creature, so you monster
fans may want to check it out. I don't know if you can try
it at home, but maybe you'll pick up a tip or two.
Buy
Creature Unknown at The Pulp Shop.
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