Writers
on Saturday Night Live must be kicking themselves now.
Think of all the goofy yet repetitive possibilities with Siamese
Twins that look nothing alike and each want to pursue wildly
different career goals. With any luck, it could be spun off
into a movie deal.
Except
the Farrelly Brothers got there first. In Stuck On You,
somehow the writing/directing team manage to keep the one
joke aloft, putting the Tenor Brothers into situations that
allow for surprising variations on the theme. It's not great.
But it is better than it has a right to be.
It helps
that The Farrellys have really fleshed out the twins with
more than just a 10-inch long slab of skin conjoining them.
Bob (Matt Damon) is the more athletic of the two, though he
carries a paunch befitting a short order cook. Content with
his life as co-owner of the Quickie Burger, he nonetheless
does what he can to support brother Walt's (Greg Kinnear)
acting aspirations. The support does cause him major panic
attacks, and the sight of a sweat-covered Bob trying to hide
behind Walt doing a one-man show is definitely one of the
highpoint visual gags of the movie.
But Walt
isn't content with life in Massachusetts, doing a show annually
for an invited audience of his friends. He has his sights
set on Hollywood. So used to his acceptance at home, it doesn't
phase Walt in the least when somebody slows down on Hollywood
Boulevard just to call out, "hey, freak!"
Despite
the obvious deformity, the Tenors are easily accepted in person,
especially by new neighbor April (Eva Mendes). This continues
a long tradition of sweetness to the Farrelly Brothers' films,
one that often proves their undoing as they try to combine
it with gross-out comedy. The balance is better here than
it has been in a while, as they've managed to give Walt and
Bob a sense of humor about themselves that allows the jokes
to work without being cruel.
They've
also managed to give diva Cher the role of a lifetime as a
(she says) more evil version of herself. Determined to get
out of what she considers a crappy television series commitment,
Cher approves the casting of Walt as her leading man (eventually,
they use blue-screen to wipe Bob out of the picture).
The very
oblivious neophyte can't believe his rags-to-riches situation,
nor does he question it. (He has no problem interrupting Meryl
Streep having lunch with her "posse," starstruck but unable
to comprehend that he's being rude.)
Due to
these plot twists, the film runs off course, though some of
the jokes stay strong. Stuck On You wants to have it
both ways: in the first half, you laugh at how well-adjusted
the Tenors are, and then for the sake of melodrama, the world
at large turns on them. There's nobody more shallow than April,
but she never blinks. However, Bob's long-distance sweetheart
May (Wen Yann Shih) runs in horror when she discovers the
twins' secret. Though she later recants, the plot enlarges
that distaste by having sponsors pulling out of Walt's TV
show, Honey and The Beaze, at the revelation of his
conjoined status.
No way.
Not if there were money to be made.
And so
it goes. The film drifts in and out of believability, mainly
because nobody other than the twins themselves seems like
a real person. Even Cher and Griffin Dunne, though playing
themselves, are so obviously sending themselves up (does Dunne
really have an image to lampoon?) that they're cut-outs
instead of characters.
However,
Damon and Kinnear hold the center quite well. There's a real
affection between them, and neither ever winks at the audience
no matter how ridiculous the scene. Kinnear proves himself
particularly good at physical comedy near the end, and takes
it completely seriously. As Bob, Damon goes against his perceived
persona as a guy that has no clue how to talk to girls (Walt
is the one that dates a lot while Bob naps) and tends to say
the wrong thing.
The film
also has a nice comic gem with Seymour Cassel as the world's
worst agent, Morty O'Reilly. Working his magic from a retirement
home, it's clear that the world stopped for him as soon as
he entered its doors. He doesn't even know that Erik Estrada
isn't on CHiPs anymore. It could be a cruel running
bit, but Cassel makes it sparkle.
As they
have in the past, The Farrelly Brothers have cast a lot of
amateur actors, usually family friends and people with special
needs. It's laudable, it's cool, and yet in a lot of places,
it gets distracting, particularly in a hospital scene where
the doctors are clearly missing their mark. Though I guess
it helps force the feeling known as "heartwarming," sometimes
you just wish these filmmakers would settle down and just
make us laugh.
Because
when they do, The Farrelly Brothers are really, really good
at it.
