| Pirates 
                    of the Caribbean: At World's End
 When a ship gets too heavy, its crew jettisons 
                      all the unnecessaries in order to lighten things and speed 
                      them up. Unfortunately for Pirates of the Caribbean: 
                      At World's End, by this time no two people can agree 
                      on what the unnecessaries are. Only one thing's for sure: 
                      Director Gore Verbinski is perfectly content to just let 
                      things drift along. The Black Pearl will reach its destination 
                      eventually.
                      While 
                      the first film 
                      did drift a bit, it at least had a straightforward plot. 
                      The only things twisting and turning at the drop of a hat 
                      were Johnny Depp's torso and limbs. Especially at the drop 
                      of a hat, as At World's End belatedly reminds us. 
                      Then 
                      in the effort to make that one-off a bona fide trilogy, 
                      screenwriters Ted Elliott & Terry Rossio brought everything 
                      back and soaked it with meaning. Rather than slow down Dead 
                      Man's Chest, however, the narrative careened wildly 
                      along, allowing little time for each new revelation to register. 
                      You just had to hang on tight and hope you didn't get swept 
                      overboard. 
                      They were also building the script around 
                      some spectacular sequences that Verbinski was determined 
                      to shoot. It doesn't seem that he was so inspired here.
                      Instead, the script does its best to introduce 
                      new adventure while wading through the muck the last movie 
                      left lying around. By introducing the dread pirate Sao Feng 
                      (Chow Yun-Fat), the film offers hope. He's sleazy, steamy 
                      and more than a match for Geoffrey Rush's Barbossa.
                    The two stare each other down while the 
                      Black Pearl's crew try to sneak through, and Verbinski turns 
                      this into a tremendous action-filled beginning, especially 
                      if you believe that monkeys are like cheese. They make everything 
                      better.  Soon enough, though, things have to slow 
                      down for a contest between Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley 
                      to see who can look more soulful, and who can make us care 
                      less. The script meanders as everyone tries to figure out 
                      if you can have pirate cake and eat it, too. Elliott and 
                      Rossio accidentally gave Bloom's Will Turner a goal that 
                      runs at cross-purposes to Elizabeth's, and the story keeps 
                      trying to shake it off, hoping no one will notice.
                      As soon as either character's arc starts 
                      to pick up speed, they have to stop and gaze longingly, 
                      as if to remind us that they're supposed to be great cinematic 
                      lovers. Forget that - one of the things George Lucas did 
                      write was throw out the noble but ultimately boring Luke 
                      Skywalker and position the roguish Han Solo for Princess 
                      Leia. The same thing should happen here - we want Jack Sparrow 
                      to get the girl, if he wants her.
                      But first he must be rescued in order to 
                      help Will and Elizabeth fight Lord Cutler Beckett (Tom Hollander) 
                      and his East India Trading Company. Except that even that 
                      can't be as it seems. Not only does Barbossa have some other 
                      plot suddenly going on with the enigmatic Tia Dalma (Naomie 
                      Harris), which entwines with Davy Jones (Bill Nighy) who 
                      has entwined with both Will and Jack who has some connection 
                      to Beckett …oh, crap, it does get a bit confusing.
                      Yet that isn't the problem. At World's 
                      End has a dense plot, yes, but if it were a novel, it 
                      would be easy to praise. It's just that curious lack of 
                      energy that Verbinski brings. At one point, he even stops 
                      things dead for the visit to "Davy Jones' Locker." Things 
                      halt so screechingly, for a moment it seems like they tacked 
                      a reel on from another film.
                    It would be easy to say that part of the 
                      problem comes from a half-hearted attempt at a theme of 
                      the old world ending. Certainly, Sparrow and Barbossa do 
                      some verbal sparring about the passing of an age. They should 
                      be headed towards a rousing last stand against civilization, 
                      but again a twist too many makes it hard to keep track of 
                      that idea.  The film also has some mumbo jumbo about 
                      freedom versus order, and obviously, in a movie about pirates, 
                      we're rooting against the traditional heroes. But At 
                      World's End has an opening making unpleasant comparisons 
                      to our current state of affairs in the United States - and 
                      that opening ends with the hanging of a child. It's really 
                      hard to warm up after that.
                      Beckett also spends time muttering about 
                      things being "…just good business." So maybe we are to take 
                      away that standard capitalism is bad, even as we buy all 
                      our ancillary Pirates merchandise. We'll be suckered 
                      into a fourth film, for sure, because that old world really 
                      can't fade away as long as we'll pay to see it.
                      So we're left with sound and fury. When 
                      the action focuses on favorite elements, we can be pleased. 
                      The problem for a ship this big is simply that we don't 
                      all like the same things. If Disney had been more honest 
                      and been willing to just admit to a fourth film earlier 
                      on, they could have saved some for later.   
                      If the fourth trims some fat, or takes the bloom off a bit, 
                      we could get back to what made this all work for us in the 
                      first place. Hello…pirates…                     Rating:    |