Falls Count Anywhere

12-30-03

mmm...Dawn Marie opened the Santa Suit...

Welcome to Falls Count Anywhere! My Name is Chris and I've been doing this for a full year.

SmackDown!
Few WWE shows carry weight as having been significant events in the history of wrestling. While there have been matches and angles that were historic, seldom has an entire show seemed to make an impact. The SmackDown! from Camp Victory over in Iraq should be remembered as one of those events.

The show itself wasn't great. Working out in the heat and the sun isn't ideal, as most shows have been indoors for the last decade. While there have been big shows outdoors, working the modern style in the elements hasn't really worked. It showed during the Guerrero vs. Benoit match that they weren't used to working outside and missed some spots due to that factor. The Santa's Little Helper bit was gratuitous, and the most entertaining thing had to be a reaction shot from one of the women in the crowd when Dawn Marie opened the Santa Suit.

Please...remember what's really important throughout this holiday season...

What did work was the atmosphere and the idea. The feeling was that this was a big event for the troops, and it didn't feel that much like another WWE show. The shots they showed of the WWE folks out in Iraq were great, made the whole thing seem like less of a work and more of a real tribute to our boys in service. There were a couple of great pops, and a few signs. Everyone was way over, especially Austin and Cena's rap.

The World's Greatest Tag Team pulled a decent match out of the APA. I like the APA, but they are not the best workers anymore and feel kinda out of place working with Los Guerreros or TWGTT. Bradshaw, who had the idea to do the show in Iraq, seemed very motivated and that rubbed off on Farooq, who gave us his best match in ages.

Guerrero vs. Benoit was strong, but far from the level that we've seen them at in the past. They missed a couple of spots, but the crowd was appreciative the whole way through. The ending wasn't perfect, but it would do for the circumstances.

The Santa's Little Helper contest was fine, since it gave us a little Dawn Marie on the screen. Seriously, she's the most underused woman on the roster at the moment. The whole thing was to get Torrie out there in her thong, and it did what it was supposed to.

The Main Event of Cena vs. Big Show was solid, if not spectacular. The crowd reacted to Cena like he was a star. The FU on Big Show is always impressive.

Not Earth-shatteringly important, but it had the feel of one of those shows from back in the day when you felt that the world of wrestling mattered to folks.

RAW
Live from San Antonio! This was a ridiculously hot crowd for much of the going, but then the WWE fell into the trap that they should have known would get them.

Regular, or Extra Tasty?

The recap of the Mick Foley situation was really good, but I still wish they had Foley in the house, since that always works the crowd. Having Orton come out to Mick's music was a nice touch, too. He had Lillian announce him as the winner of the match with Mick Foley. Lillian looked extra tasty. Booker T came out to set up an IC title challenge for later in the night.

Scott Steiner and Rob Van Dam had a match that didn't suck. Scott did what he could, and RVD pulled it in a little, though he got all of his signature moves in. He did the Split-Leg Moonsault at one point and landed face first on Steiner's chest. It looked weird, but he was fine. Steiner can still throw some nice suplexes.

Throughout the night they showed highlights from Shawn Michaels' career. They showed his match from the AlamoDome in 1997 and his feud with HHH from last year. It really built up Michaels in the same way the WCW built up Flair for his match with Vader at Starrcade 93.

They showed the package from SmackDown! of the stars heading over. They are learning: do something right, then remind people that they did it right through well made recap packages.

Christian and Jericho did a backstage bit where Christian basically said "Bros before hos, Lionheart" and Jericho replied "but not when women are involved."

The Dudleys lost to two jobbers when special ref Ric Flair disqualified The Dudleys for using a closed fist. This was a classic Memphis bit where they would do a "Strictly Scientific" rules match, which always ended with the heel spitting on the face and the face throwing a punch. You can do these things once in a while, but not too often. Bautista came and laid a great big beatdown upon them.

They had Coach with Vince McMahon, supposedly back in Stamford where they were deciding Stone Cold's fate. Coach was great playing a subtle heel commentator in the guise of Broadcast Journalist. The segment with Vince was great, and the one with Linda let Coach play his role even better. Really nice touch.

All I wanted for Christmas...

Terri did an interview with the scrumptious Lita, Stacey, and Trish. They were all Christmasfied in hot little Santa outfits. All of a sudden, Austin drove his truck in to an awesome pop. He stayed in the truck, waiting for a call from the Board of Directors.

Booker T and Randy Orton had a match that built really nicely. I love the way Booker T lays things out, making most match flow from one spot to the next very logically. Orton was obviously calling spots, which is never a bad thing, but you sorta had to notice it. Kane's pyro burst, allowing Randy to hit the RKO (what the hell's a Radio Picture?) for the pin. Solid match.

Jericho tried to give Trish her Christmas present backstage, but she was having none of it. She said that Jericho broke her heart. She's not a great actress, but she sure is purdy.

Trish, Stacey and Lita took on Molly, Jacky Gayda and Victoria in a Happy Holidays match. The match itself wasn't very good. Victoria has serious knee troubles, as she was a little wobbly in her opening exchange with Molly. She also looked hotter than fire. Seriously, she's the most attractive woman in the WWE, no question. Lita busted out a sweet headscissors out of a side suplex attempt. Victoria tossed Jacky from the apron to the outside, getting a good pop from the crowd for it. After Trish got the pin, Victoria helped Molly up, then hit her with the belt and acted all crazy.

Shawn Michaels proved my selection correct by finishing the year with the best Television match on RAW since the classic HHH/Austin vs. Jericho and Benoit match from 2001. This was a classic, big time Main Event, with amazing heat. They laid out the match so that they worked to the big spots with simple moves, like Michaels holding a headlock for a couple of minutes. Michaels did a huge dive onto Flair and HHH where he hit the retaining wall and looked to have dislocated his hip. He came back in limping, but still gave a gutsy and impressive performance. They did a ton of near falls, all of which got huge responses from the crowd. They were giving them Hogan-Andre type heat.

They then made their way to the finish where Michaels hit the Sweet Chin Music and fell on top, but his shoulders were down too. Bischoff, who had taken over for the bumped ref, announced that HHH had retained the title. Michaels complained and Bisch fired him.

I do not even care what they won...

Now, this is the sort of thing that can kill a city, but they did bring Austin out to accept his return to RAW and announce that Michaels would get a rematch. He then Stunnered Bischoff and the show ended. That helped, but was it enough? We'll find out later this year when the WWE comes back to San Antonio.

A great show to end the year with. I was most impressed with the wrestling, and everyone seems to have benefited from the extra week off. I hope they do more with this, but I still wish they had given Michaels the belt.

News
There are folks who are questioning whether or not Kurt Angle will be back to a full time schedule. His neck is getting worse, and it's even been said that he is thinking of getting the neck fusion surgery and taking the year off sometime following WrestleMania. The guy is a Hall of Famer if he can stay healthy, but it's looking less and less likely.

Dirty Dick Slater is in trouble. The guy who was a big star in the late 1970s and 1980s was arrested for Attempted Murder, apparently for stabbing his girlfriend 3 times with a big ol' knife. Slater has been working in the business for close to 30 years, though I hadn't seen his name in any arena reports for a few months. He was a big partier back in the day, and at one point was dating Dark Journey, the valet that had the famous run-in with Missy Hyatt.

FlashBack!
There is a saying: you should only give away the things you can't sell. Wrestling has a history of ignoring that warning. The fall of wrestling in the late 1950s and 60s can be linked to too much free TV on the networks, leading to house show money (what drove the industry back in those days) drying up. The WWF quickly learned that Free TV can lead to big things in all other areas.

So, here is a listing of the Ten Most Important Free TV Episodes in History. (Note: This covers only non-subscription-based cable programs, network TV, and does not include shows like WrestleMania 1 which were not shown in their entirety, but shown over several dates. Also missing, the Royal Rumble 1988, the First Monday Night RAW, The Flair vs. Perfect RAW and an ECW episode that Garcia was evidently too drunk to finish describing..editor.)

10) The ECW RAW from The Manhattan Center in New York City, February 24th, 1987. This was a big show, not only for the fact that the boys from ECW were showing up in the WWF to plug their up-coming PPV, but the Road Warriors returned to the Fed after several years away. The show was great, with Little Guido taking on Stevie Richards, and Taz against Mikey Whipwreck with a Sabu appearance diving off the top of the giant letters that spelt RAW. A great show that exposed ECW to far more people than ever before.

Sorry...had a theme going here...hope you understand...

9) The Final Nitro from South Padre Island, Texas, March 26th, 2001. The end of the Monday Night Wars. You'd think this would be higher, but the battles had really ended long before, far lessening its importance. The WCW was merely a shell by 2001, but they still had some good stuff. Booker T took on Scott Steiner in a US Title vs. World Title match where Booker T won it all in a match that should be remembered, but will certainly be over-shadowed by the fact that Vince McMahon was on Nitro. The last moment on a WCW Nitro was a WrestleMania commercial. Burn everything, then salt the Earth.

8) ECW TV from The ECW Arena in Philadelphia, PA September 23rd, 1995. This show gets over-looked a lot. It introduced Rey Misterio and Psicosis to the US wrestling mainstream for the first time. The two of them tearing it up in ECW, along with bringing La Parka, Konnan, and Juventud Guerrera along, is what brought Lucha into WCW and eventually into the WWF. At the end of the show, after this great match, Joey Styles was doing his wrap-up when Steve Austin came out dressed as Hulk Hogan, saying that Steve-A-Mania was running wild. It was what really announced that Austin was ready to become a superstar.

7) Black Saturday: The WWF Debuts on TBS, July 14th, 1984. Vince McMahon bought out the Saturday timeslot from Georgia Championship Wrestling and debuted his show. There was no notice given to fans whatsoever, though a couple of weeks before, they had switched the traditional Georgia Championship Wrestling in-studio matches to matches from House Shows. The WWF did some live stuff from the WTBS studios in Atlanta, but mostly clips from House Shows, too. The whole thing ended up with tons of irate fans of the NWA calling in and complaining. Not too long after, Bill Watt's Mid-South got a timeslot in the evening and Championship Wrestling from Georgia came around. Eventually, Vince reneged on the contract and gave TBS back to the NWA.

6) The Main Event on NBC, February 5th, 1988. The first Prime Time Network Wrestling since the DuMont went off the air, and one of those important matches with an amazing twin ref finish that I have spoken of many times. A solid show that featured the ending of Hulk Hogan's first title reign. Would be higher on the list if it had led to a regular network wrestling show, but as it is, still hugely historic.

5) The First Nitro from the Mall of America, September 4th, 1995. The WCW / WWF war didn't start with Nitro, but that was the first heavy gun fire. TNT, still the stepchild of TBS at that time, had a big show to promote, and there was no RAW competition. It was a big deal and a show with some really good wrestling. Jushin Liger took on Brian Pillman in a very good match between two guys that knew each other very well. The main event between Flair and Sting was good and featured Lex Luger making a surprise appearance, announcing his return to WCW. They didn't even tell Sting that he was coming back.

4) WWF's All Star Wrestling on January 7th, 1984 from St. Louis. This was huge. The WWF was doing a TV taping in St. Louis, long the ceremonial center of the NWA. This, more than any other show, announced that the WWF was taking over and pushing the territories aside in favor of Vince's vision. The show wasn't good, certainly not by the standards that St. Louis fans were used to, but it did scream that everything was about to change.

3) The First Clash of the Champions, March 27th, 1988. The NWA put up a big show on TBS to run against WrestleMania 4. The plan worked, as it scored big ratings and made Sting into a real contender-type star. The show had some great stuff, from the fantastic Midnight Express vs. The Fantastics match to a low-key Barbed Wire match to Windham and Luger winning the Tag Team Titles to a huge pop to the legendary 45 minute time-limit draw between Flair and the Stinger. What made this so important is that they proved that they could take some of the air out of the WWF's sails. They were playing hardball just as well as Vince had when he put the Survivor Series up against Starrcade 1987.

2) The Owen Hart Memorial Raw on May 24th, 1999. The saddest event in the history of wrestling. Owen Hart had died the night before and for the first time, the WWF did tragedy right. They gave the wrestlers the chance to pay tribute to Owen by having them tell their stories of Owen, send their wishes and work short, non-storylined matches. It was a draining show for many fans, as the newsgroup Rec-Sport-Pro-Wrestling had hundreds of responses to the show, almost all of them positive, and the dozen or so people in the room with me were all in tears throughout. The most heartfelt moment in the history of wrestling.

1) Scott Hall appears on Monday Nitro on May 27th, 1996. This has to be the most important moment in the WWF / WCW war. Scott Hall was a big deal as Razor Ramon. Everyone knew he was leaving and going to WCW. Kevin Nash was going to follow, but once Hall showed up, everyone knew that the WWF wasn't going to be able to compete for a while, as the WCW was getting hot. The Hall arrival led to the New World Order and the most lucrative period in WCW history. It would be almost 2 years before the WWF would come back and win a Monday Night Ratings War.

That's all for now. More on Friday, which will be my 1-year anniversary!

Chris Garcia