Falls Count Anywhere

10-07-03

I have a solid heel in me at least once a week.

Welcome to Falls Count Anywhere! My name is Chris and I had dinner with Mariachis in San Diego on Friday!

RAW
Kane and Rosie had a match that didn't suck. I liked it enough, since it didn't waste my time. The back suplex was sweet. I like Rosie's Airplane Flight into the Legdrop. It was OK, which for these two actually means great.

The "Kane gets suckered into getting into the car by Shane so that he could run into him with the truck" bit was kinda cool. I still think someone else should be getting this push instead of Shane, but they did it nicely enough. But I am getting a little tired of recycling old Steve Austin angles.

The aftermath was made to look alternately cool and devalued by the way they went on with the show. The blood and the injuries were a nice touch, though. These types of angles can lead to real injuries, like Hart and Goldberg actually suffered in the past. Still, a good visual.

Hey, Gotta give it up to Lita…if she'd let me! No, seriously, the match was only OK, but Lita looked hot and got some great heat. Gail Kim looked sharper than Lita this time, but that's likely due to the long layoff for Miss Dumas.

HHH's money angle is working, and it manages to keep HHH in the spotlight. That is a mixed blessing, but it's giving a bit of rub to the boys on bottom. There have been some great bounty angles in history, and if this works, it will miraculously take a place beside them.

The Scott Steiner and Stacey Keibler angle has been annoying me for months. Scott had a match with Spike that sucked, as expected. Spike is so good in his role as underdog that it hurts to see him treated as a jobber. The Dudley run-in indicates that this angle will continue, if only to annoy me.

Le Resistance tries to collect the bounty by jumping Goldberg. These are the things they need to be doing. If they let Goldberg deflect all attacks this completely, he'll get back his mystique.

The Highlight Reel was OK, and I really think that putting Jericho and Christian with Coach is a good idea, as Coach really does have a solid heel in him. The Storm stuff was obviously going to happen, and the Austin stuff was his best in a while, but I wasn't sold on this segment.

However, the match that came of it worked. Long, with good back and forth all over the place. RVD brought it to Jericho, but was not as good with Christian. Storm was excellent in his role. RVD brought out the Split-legged Moonsault. Best Rolling Thunder in ages.

The crowd was into it, too. They need to give me a match like this every week. The near falls towards the end were smart, and the crowd really responded to them. A strong match that had a fun ending that gave Storm a little something.

Teddy Long got the mic and let us all know what time it is. He can talk and the WWE is recognizing it finally. If only they would give him real heels to manage...

Jindraik and Cade are a team that are begging to be put under a pair of masks and used as a strong contender team. They are likely to try and push it with them as a regular team, but they could go far as a sort of Doom-like team where everyone is gunning for their masks. The match with Evolution was OK, with Orton doing that awesome backbreaker, but there wasn't much to this match in my eyes. By the way, Orton knocking the WWE magazine out of the hands of that security guard lady was a nice touch.

Sure, Maven and Richards were involved, but YOU don't care...

Trish and Maven take on Victoria and Richards in a match that isn't bad, since Victoria and Stratus are the best women in the company. Giving this feud a solid end and then giving Lita to Victoria for a while would be a great idea, as it would give them a chance to work with each other for the first time. By the way, both these broads are hotter 'an anything.

Mark Henry is awful. Goldberg needs a strong foil to make for a good match. Somehow these two manage to have a match that I thought was fine, more due to the booking and The Heartbreak Kid (with his new Jesus Fish shirt) being involved. It made for an entertaining ending.

Overall, I'd say this was an average show, but it had entertaining moments. The Steiner stuff kills a crowd, and too much felt like recycling, but there were good matches, strong booking, a new storyline set up and a good bit of advancing. I'd say it was not as good as last week, but better than SmackDown! last week.

NEWS
Hulk looks to have signed with TNA. Not sure what will happen, but for TNA's sake, I hope it doesn't kill them. The money is too high for far too little return.

Stu Hart is in the hospital following a fall in his home. He's 85 or so, so anytime he has to go in is serious. He's been in and out over the last couple of years. Michael Goodson is expected to pay a visit to him shortly to try and "…elevate his mood"

FlashBack!
A top ten. This time: Top Ten Flying Moves Ever.

Kids, don't try this at home...oops, too late...

10) The Swanton Bomb- Jeff Hardy was a great flyer before he imploded. I used to love the Swanton, when he would look like he was about to land vertical on his opponent's chest. It used to look so sweet.

9) The Flying Elbow- Randy Savage and Shawn Michaels both had amazing Flying Elbows. It's hard to say which would be better. Savage was the guy who popularized it, but Michaels' is just so pretty. No one else comes close to the level of these.

8) The Gran Hamada Jumping, Swinging DDT- It's such a gorgeous move, and he only started doing it after he was 45. Hamada, who doesn't get the respect he deserves, easily does the best JSDDT in the world.

7) The Split-legged Moonsault- RVD invented it, and while other folks do it now, none are as clean. RVD uses it far less now, but he still brings it out once in a while and it still impresses.

6) Savage Double Ax-handle to the Outside- A move that had been nearly forgotten until Kurt Angle used it against Brock in the Ironman match. I remember always being afraid that he'd bust his ankle on one of those jumps. Huge move for the mid-1980s.

5) The 540 Splash- 2 Cold Scorpio made it popular. John Kronus became the first fat guy to pull it off. Now, kids are doing it off of rooftops onto tables on those backyard wrestling videos. Still, it's impressive to see a guy do it in a ring.

4) The Mysterio Flying Body Press. Well, he has so many moves, but none are this clean. He has a perfect form as he leaps off the corner. Only Ricky Steamboat's comes close to the beauty that Rey launches.

3) The Skytwister Press- Chaparita Asari is a name that you've never heard. She was a tiny Japanese women's wrestler in All Japan Women's in the 1990s. She would take big bumps and had a style like Rey Mysterio did at the time. But her finisher was amazing. She'd go to the top turnbuckle like she was going for a moonsault, but she'd do two full twists as she pulled off the sault. It was breathtaking.

2) The Superfly Splash- So simple. Jump off the top, land on your opponent. The reason this one worked was simple: Jimmy Snuka. He had a charisma that built to the move, and when he was on the top rope, everything paused until the flashes went off. The first major flying move to become an international phenomenon.

1) Sabu's Triple Jump Moonsault- Sabu was the hardcore flyer of the mid-1990s, the first to regularly use chairs not only to hit guys, but to jump off. The triple jump was great: set up a chair in the middle, then go off the opposite ropes, jump off the chair, balance on the top rope for a second before moonsaulting back onto your opponent. The only move that always stunned me that it worked.

That's all for Monday. More fun on Friday.

Chris Garcia