Falls Count Anywhere

07-29-03

Fanboy Planet plays a "swish" effect when I leave the shot.

Welcome to Falls Count Anywhere! My name is Chris and I can't afford a new muffler.

RAW
Hey, Vince opened the show. I am not surprised that it happened. It wasn't bad, and at least it was short.

Test and Christian against Booker T and Scott Steiner is just another set of matches that stretches out a pair of storylines that need to end. The work isn't bad, but still, not what I want to see.

Goldberg got a really good pop. The feeding of jobbers to Goldberg worked once, but that boat has sailed. The match was short, the reaction good, and the post-match was pretty standard, but Goldberg sounded better than he has in the past. HHH is back in his old form, thank God.

Val Venis was a groundbreaking gimmick back in 1997. Rico is reheated Goldust, but Miss Jacky Gayda is really hot, and only one step above complete failure as a Tough Enough winner. The match wasn't very good, but they tried. I like Rico as a worker, but they will never get him over.

I hate this Kane stuff. I want Kane to have a real push, but the way it's going bothers me.

The Highlight Reel isn't a bad segment, as it usually is the non-wrestling highlight of RAW. Randy Orton was solid, but gets no reaction. Jericho is amusing, and can carry the segment. Michaels was his usual great self, giving an interview that reminded me of 1996. I hope that he gets in the Hall of Fame this year, as he has done nothing but good stuff since he returned. Huge HBK champ that shows what people want. Son of a Bitch seems to have become the next big thing to call a chumstain. Jericho was great reacting to Michaels, but Nash getting involved can only lead to trouble.

Jericho can drag a decent match out of almost anyone, even the immobile log that is the ex-Big Daddy Cool. I am fairly certain that the only thing Nash understands is beating on the leg for heat. This wasn't great, but far better than most of Nash's matches over the last year. Once you introduce plunder, you can get more out of Diesel.

This Hurricane stuff is not at all good, even though I like the Hurricane a lot. Nothing better to do with Rosey, I guess. I still love the swoosh effect they play when 'cane leaves the shot.

Hey, Bischoff made a crack at the ACLU. I like him more already. The Kane stuff still sucks.

Garrison Cade and Mark Jindrak wrestling La Resistance. These are four young guys, and with the Dudleys out, the crowd naturally called for tables because the work in the ring was not enough. Apparently, folks around the WWE are high on Renee Dupree, but not so much on Sylvan Granier. It's about what I feel, though I think they could both have careers with a year or two more seasoning. Not a good match, but they showed that they could be greats.

On her way up to being "Best Chick."

Gail Kim is pretty good, and Molly is always in working hard. Molly tossed Gail off the top rope! Bow and Arrow! Why is it that we only see a bow and arrow in the chick fights? Gail needs to work on her transitions, but should be the best chick in a year or so. I did not expect Molly to win the title. I am glad she did, too, as it means some fun matches in the next few weeks.
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The final segment wasn't bad. Vince offering to become Kane's owner, which I believe will make him Toby now. Austin coming out added to the segment, but didn't move it much, but having Shane come out was a nice touch. A nice tackle and he looked tough as hell.

Too much McMahon, but good enough for me to say I liked it a lot. Now that RAW is coming out of the lame duck period it might just get better.

Vengeance Report
Well, the pay-per-view happened and it was better than I expected with some really solid wrestling. What I expected to be bad was pretty bad, but not truly awful.

Benoit vs. Eddy was a solid match that built on the ground. Yes, we've seen this match a hundred times, but it's always good. Does it sell tickets? I doubt it. Does it help make for positive PPV experiences? More often than not. The ending was a little weird, but it had some great sections. I'd say it's worth about four stars. Got this one right.

Hey, any of the skits backstage were pretty lame. The flowers bit was awful. Man, why do we get these things?

The Noble beating of Billy Gunn was pretty much what was expected, but Noble got a decent reaction, and he played the heel, but the fans seemed to want him to win. Gunn has a few good moves, but needs to be part of a tag team to be effective. I called this one right.

...and yet, any excuse to run a picture of Doink works for me.

The Barroom Brawl was an excuse to send the Easter Bunny through a mirror. It wasn't great, but there were a few OK bumps. Not enough to justify this, and even Brother Love, whose brother is FCA's patron saint Dr. Tom Pritchard, did more harm than good to the segment. Another one right for the chris-ster.

The Tag Titles match was great. The World's Greatest Tag Team are quickly becoming the world's greatest tag team. I am a big time fan of Billy and Rey, and the Shooting Star Press off the ropes to the outside was huge, even though I've seen it in Mexico for years. The work was great, the crowd pumped at times, and easily Billy's best match in WWE. Hey, another one right.

I hated Sable vs. Stephanie. Here's my problem, it had heat and it may have sold a few buys, but it is bad for the product to have stuff of this quality. I will say that Steph had a little bit of Shane in her as she gave all she had, but it wasn't much. The coming push for A-Train is an awful omen.

John Cena should have gone over in the best of all possible worlds. Undertaker moved exactly as I expected. They need to give Cena a push the likes of which Randy Orton has never seen, but they decide it's more important to keep UT happy.

Vince vs. Zach was only so-so, and through no fault of Zach Gowen. Keep the kid in limited situations and I am certain he will shine, for a while at least. The gusher that Vince hit at the end of the match was sick.

The main event was solid beyond all measure. Even with Big Show sucking wind at a mile high, he did what he had to and Brock and Angle picked up the slack. Some great brawling, some great wrestling, some great storytelling. Kurt going over clean is a good call that I didn't expect them to go with. I am all sorts of happy, but still, didn't see it coming.

That's all for today. More on Friday, but be sure to read my interview with the folks From Parts Unknown.

Chris Garcia