hmm.. set Thursday ...hit program ...yup, all done.

Chair Shots

11-8-02

Ordinarily at this point in a Friday Chairshots, I'd give you a rundown and recap of last night's Smackdown.

However, since my new digital video recorder failed to record it (user error) we're going to try something different. Letters from my adoring fans (all 3 of you) have been pouring in and I thought I'd share them with everyone.

Hey man,
Still love the column, still the most insightfull wrestling journalism around.

Ass kissing out of the way,

Thanks for the ass kissing. You remind me of a young Derek McCaw.

I saw Steph on Howard Stern the other night, and I gotta say she is really funny! It's too bad the writters can't come up with some more humor for her character, I think people would really like to see that as opposed to the ball busting mega bitch that they think every women in power should be.

My wife and I watched Steph on Howard Stern as well. Both of us thought she handled it all quite well and she came off as being both intelligent and witty. I also thought she was hot but I didn't ask my wife for her opinion.

Why is it that they think that women should either be sluts or bitches (man, I'm starting to sound like a rap song!) The only person who I can think of that doesn't really fall into this category right now is Lita, and she's still out of commission in the ring.

Well, I try not to put too much thought into the concept of pro-wrestling but I believe that it appeals to a very low form of entertainment to us which is usually filled with stereotypes. Wrestling is filled with violence and the humor is at best slapstick. Think about the Three Stooges. It's not overly clever and yet it appeals to a large fan base. How funny would it have been if after Moe gave Curly a noogie if Curly had snuck up behind him and hit him with a chair?

Like the women in the Three Stooges, female wrestling characters are (typically bad) stereotypes. Stooges had snooty, high society women and wrestling has powerful bitches. Stooges had the doe eyed love interest and wrestling has the sex pot that all men desire. Same low brow concept, just updated with a modern day twist. All wrestling characters are just that, characters. Trish plays the tough, yet sexy women's champ that's being hunted by the insane, jealous Victoria. Triple H plays the cocky champion in a feud with the cocky ex-champ on the comeback trail. No one plays themselves in on TV because we have no interest in seeing the wrestler that's been in the business for 15 year, has bad knees but it is still chasing his dream of getting over with the fans (except Mick Foley. Him we like.)

One quick question for ya, does it seem like they are throwing a voice change on the Big Show? I've noticed that they are doing something with his voice to make it seem deeper, is that supposed to be more intimidating, because to me it just comes off as forced.

I haven't noticed them altering the Big Show's voice, but to be honest I'm usually half asleep when he begins talking. I think he's just using his "acting mean" voice.

Anywho keep up the good work, and I'll keep reading it.

Hats off,
Monty

(note from Derek: Michael Goodson never knew a young Derek McCaw.)

Hi there, I really like your column and the whole Fanboy website in particular (being an Angel, Buffy, Tough Enough, Wrestling, Alias, movie fan, it works out pretty well for me).

I was wondering if you know of any sources for looking up old WWF plotlines/history. I was a huge fan when I was younger, but then drifted away for 15 years or so. I recently returned to watching wrestling (I started right in the middle of the Invasion) and I'm pretty much caught
up, but there are a lot of references I don't get. In particular, what the f* happened with Bret Hart? I keep hearing about some big incident a few years ago, but no details.

Anyway, thanks a lot for an entertaining column.

Jay Smith-Hill

Hey Jay,

Glad you like the site as much as we do. There are a number of sites that recap shows weekly but none that I can think of that recap plotlines as a whole. I searched online for what is known as the "Montreal Screwjob" but couldn't find anyone that actually details what happened. There is an A&E documentary about the incident called "Hitman Hart: Wrestling with Shadows"that is available on Amazon.com. However, here it is in a nutshell.

Shortly before Survivor Series 1997, WWF Champion Bret Hart and the WWF decided to part company. Bret had agreed to a deal with WCW and had Vince McMahon's blessing to leave because McMahon could no longer afford to pay Hart's contract. As champion, Hart had to defend the title at one last PPV which turned out to be Survivor Series.

The WWF wanted Hart to lose the title to Shawn Michaels whose popularity was just starting to hit its peak. The problem was that Bret and Shawn legitimately hated each other and Bret didn't want to drop the title to Michaels. Bret also didn't want to lose the title in his home country of Canada. Vince and Bret debated back and forth about what to do.

Hart suggested that he win the match against Shawn at Survivor Series and then lose the title the next night to another wrestler (non televised.) Vince's point was that Bret's contract ended before the next television tapings and he couldn't take the risk of Hart walking out on the WWF and appearing on WCW Nitro holding the WWF title belt.

With Bret refusing to lose the title to Michaels, Vince had no choice to agree to Hart's demands. Shawn would lose the match at Survivor Series and Hart would lose the title at a later date in a non-televised match.

The match with Shawn went off as planned at the PPV but towards the end of the match Vince came down to ringside and started watching. Shawn put Bret into a submission hold (the Sharp Shooter, as I recall). Bret was supposed to break out of the hold but before he could, referee
Earl Hebner called for the bell and declared that Shawn was the winner by submission. Earl and Shawn quickly fled the ring. Bret spit on McMahon and started motioning the letters WCW to the fans and cameras.

After the PPV went off the air, Bret caught up with McMahon backstage and punched him.

Bret's career was never the same. His run in WCW was unremarkable and cut short due to injury. His bitterness towards Vince McMahon was permeated every interview Bret gave and fans grew bored with it. It became even worse when Bret blamed Vince for Owen's death.

Though the two have had brief conversations over the last few years about a possible comeback, it seems unlikely due the their history and Bret's deteriorating health. So now you know all about the Montreal screw job or at least you know how I remember it. Check your local video store for a copy of Wrestling With Shadows for the in-depth juicy details.

In the meantime feel free to keep writing with those questions or more flattery!

Hey there, me again: The 60s and 70s guy that wrote a while back. I promise not to mention Red Bastien this time. I just thought that your observation regarding some guy who has been struggling on the semi-pro circuit rather than the weak characters in "Tough Enough" hit the nail on the head.

When you consider that nearly a third of WWE talent came over from ECW and a few more from WCW, it's rather surprising that we still get handed the same lame matches over and over again.

Sorry, but Maven is never going to go toe-to-toe with any of the top guys, let alone Brock Lesnar or the humiliatingly underutilized Rob Van Dam. I though a while back when he had his "mini feud" with Undertaker that Rob was actually on his way, but he's still somehow stuck in go nowhere matches. Here is a guy that could actually spark some interest with his abilities and his cocky attitude. Instead, we keep seeing him thrown into situations where his talent is wasted.

There must be dozens of guys on circuits around the country who could be another Rob Van Dam, but I'm not sure the WWE organization would actually know a star when they saw one, particularly as they are still pushing (sorry, I nodded off there for a moment) Big Show. I like when people call him "Show," as if that's actually his name.

Back in the "good old days" (I promise to keep this short) we had teams that stayed together for long runs. The Von Brauners, the Von Stroheims, the Assassins, the Nielson Brothers, The Graham Brothers, Mark Lewin and Don Curtis, just to name a few. Today they just pick names out of hats, I think.

Trying to combine "Real World" with wrestling must have seemed like a pretty awesome idea at the start, but the few Tough Enough shows I have seen have been total yawns. I'd rather watch reruns of even some of the lesser talents from the ECW.

And I have to say that it was a mistake dropping Dean Malenko. Back when he and Chis Benoit were tag teams in ECW, they were terrific together. His no-nonsense, no hype style was a refreshing change from all the over-hyped and undertalented wrestlers. Just my opinion. Instead we get Eddie Guerrero?

Well, thanks for providing the entertainment that WWE doesn't seem to deliver. Your columns continue to be thought provoking, as well as darn funny sometimes. Keep up the good work. I need something until WWE proves it can actually get its act together.

And to think I once was of the opinion that Steve Austin and The Rock could never carry a show. But that was way back then and this is now. Where is the talent when you need them most?

Best regards,
Jim

Jim! Always good to hear from you.

The first season of Tough Enough wasn't bad. I believe that Maven does have a lot of talent and can be an entertaining mid-card wrestler. Nidia has also blossomed into a great talent so TE1 was a success. TE2 was a big step back. While entertaining, neither of the winner have shown that they deserved it. Jackie stunk up the ring on Raw several months ago and hasn't been seen since. They must have punished Linda too because she disappeared around the same time. It's still pretty early in the season but I'm predicting another round of disappointing winners this year. I think the best we can hope for is another round of Real World type TV
where all the contestants end up cheating on their significant others.

Dean Malenko never got over with the fans due to his bland personality but there is no denying his wrestling talent. He'd make an excellent trainer on Tough Enough. Eddie Guerrero may go a little overboard with his Latino Heat character but he has his entertaining moments. I'd take
one Eddie Guerrero over a dozen Mark Henrys any day.

Back in the days when the WWF was kicking WCW around like a soccer ball we fans used to laugh and laugh at all the mistakes WCW made. Production errors, failing to develop new stars, under utilizing talent, dropping plot points, booking on the fly, lame storylines and publicity stunts were are the trademarks of WCW. Who's laughing now? Well, no one because
WCW is gone, but you get my point...

I miss both Steve Austin and The Rock but in a way I'm glad they are gone. Being on Raw would only hurt them. They will be back but not before some major changes have been made to the WWE creative team.

And that's it for today. I'll be back on Tuesday to rip on Raw, provided that I can figure out the digital video recorder before then. If not, I guess we can talk about Seventh Heaven and Everwood.

Michael Goodson