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Ladies,
watch out for me in a bear suit and a bowtie.
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Chair Shots
11-1-02
Smackdown
Rundown
Wrestling genius Ultimate Warrior recently updated his website
with a new commentary. Among the ramblings was a quote that
made me laugh out loud. "I don't watch WWE TV programming.
But here is the summation of it all: Even those who keep watching
think it sucks." Well, he's half right. Fortunately for us,
there is still Smackdown.
How can
you not like a show that features Edge vs. Chris Benoit in
a 15 minute match? You'd have to count this match as PPV quality,
since that's about how much time they'd be given at a PPV.
I'm so sick of the ridiculous storylines on Raw. Two guys
beating the snot out of each other is all I really need for
entertainment.
It must
have been a night for wrestling because Kurt Angle vs. Eddy
Guerrero was another outstanding contest. It is starting to
become a little obvious that Smackdown is just mixing up these
same four guys in different matches week after week, but if
the end result is a four star match, who am I to complain?
At least no one is boffing a corpse.
I have
a soft spot in my heart for holiday shows. When a show is
over the top for the sake of being over the top, it's tiresome,
but when it's over the top because it's a holiday, I really
enjoy it. It's always nice to see the Halloween party going
on in the background and see how it gets worked into the night's
storylines. Did anyone else find it odd that when Chris Benoit
and Kurt Angle were searching for each other, they always
suspected a guy in a mask, but neither of them gave a second
glance to the guy in the bear costume? That bear could have
been anybody, and yet he was never a suspect. What is it about
the loveable nature of a bear in a bowtie that puts even the
hardest hearts at ease?
Another
week, another chapter in the Dawn Marie vs. Torrie Wilson
feud. As lame as it is, it's 100% better than anything Raw
is doing. My only complaint is that Dawn Marie hasn't won
a single encounter with Torrie. Why is she still trying? Isn't
banging Torrie's Dad victory enough? I of course mean that
from Dawn Marie's perspective, not mine.
Matt
Hardy Version One vs. Tajiri was an enjoyable midcard match.
Hardy has really stepped up his heel persona and is now far
beyond his brother in terms of popularity. Tajiri continues
to flounder in the character department.
Spiders
scare the macho right out of me. The thought of Fabulous Moolah
and Mae Young in a hot three way with Tajiri makes me curl
up into the fetal position and cry "Mommy." But both of those
pale in comparison to The Big Show with a live mic and 10
minutes of network television time.
What chucklehead
in the WWE actually thinks that Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show
is a money making feud? Aren't 5000 live fans booing Big Show
enough of a clue that this isn't going to sell a PPV?
I guess
since the Elimination Chamber match is going to be the main
event at SummerSlam, the WWE doesn't feel the need to have
a big name star fall prey to Lesnar on the undercard. Have
you noticed how the fans are so not entertained by Big Show
that Brock Lesnar is becoming the default face in that match
up? Way to kill months of heat building for the Next Big Thing.
Speaking
of Lesnar, it is always a sick pleasure to watch a guy his
size fight a shrimp like Rey Mysterio. I know they just had
Lesnar vs. Super Funaki a few weeks ago, but it's still fun
to watch. It was going pretty good, too, until Big Show made
his predictable entrance at the end and ruined it. Boo Big
Show, Boo! Last but not least, Stephanie and Eric Bischoff
locked lips. Bitter rivals that fall deeply in love. Been
there, seen that, predicted it months ago.
Moose
Cholak Dies
For you long time wrestling fans, Edward "Moose" Cholak, a
former IWA World Champion and NWA World Tag Team Champion,
passed away Thursday morning in Hammond, Indiana. He was 72.
Moose developed pneumonia after suffering a stroke on October
22nd.
Ratings
This week's edition of Smackdown did a 3.3 broadcast rating.
That is down from last week's 3.7. Like rats on a sinking
ship…
Goodbye
Russo, Version 4
Vince Russo is apparently gone from NWA: TNA. Russo was the
head booker up until recently. There was friction between
him and owner Jerry Jarrett. Russo wanted complete control
of the creative content while Jarrett wanted final say. A
new company has taken over the majority interest in TNA. Russo
was offered the position of secondary writer, but he turned
it down and quit. Hey Russo, I hear Raw is looking to hire
shitty writers. Send 'em your resume.
Goldberg
Bill Goldberg updated his website this week with a few interesting
tidbits. He blasted WWE's necrophilia angle and commented
on how it might impact his signing with the company.
"It's
disgusting," he writes. "The truth is, that just
further enhances the reason why I'm not a part of their show."
Bill is smarter than I gave him credit for.
Goldberg
also mentioned that his best Halloween costume ever was the
year he dressed up as The Ultimate Warrior. While he did not
dress up this year, he did say that at his next costume-party,
he plans to go as a dog, with a doghouse on his head. I'm
guessing he's supposed to be Kevin Nash's career.
That's
it for this week. Join me again on Tuesday.
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