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Chairshots
10/05/01

Smackdown Thoughts
Smackdown was a huge improvement over Raw this week as is becoming the norm. Rob Van Dam and Kurt Angle had an awesome match. I replayed the part where RVD leg dropped Angle on the table to bust open his lip and I really don't see how RVD can be blamed for that. Angle's face was simply in the wrong position. Torrie and Stacy added just the right kind of T&A (gratuitous) to the show. Overall I enjoyed the show but I want to spend a minute focusing on the little things. I'll talk more about that at the end of the column. Smackdown did a final broadcast rating of 3.7, which is down 0.2 from last week. Friends scored an 18.9. Next week Survivor: Africa debuts. All the wrestlers should wear shorts and back packs next week to confuse dumb people. At the end of the show everyone can vote Albert out of the locker room.

Kane Overweight?
Kane lost in a match to Booker T last night. Is this punishment for gaining a little weight in the last few weeks or has the WWF finally decided to stop jobbing Booker T? I really don't know. I'm just here to ask lame rhetorical questions.

Goldberg Eats Crow
Bill Goldberg removed his shoe from his mouth this week by updating his website. Last week Goldy made remarks against the WWF because none of the WWF wrestlers had done anything to help in the relief efforts in New York, or so he thought. "I want to clarify and correct a comment I made following my visit Sept. 26th to Ground Zero in New York City. I questioned the World Wrestling Federation's support for the New York Policemen and Firefighters, based on the fact the New York Policemen and Firefighters who I spoke with had not had any contact and/or support from the WWF. Well, I spoke too soon; and I am man enough to admit when I am wrong. Upon further investigation, I am happy to report that, yes, the WWF has supported the New York Policemen and Firefighters, among others, since the tragic Attack on America. Some WWF personnel has visited New York City and other donations have been made, too; that I know for a fact. It's good to know that the WWF stepped up to the plate big time in New York and, for that, I applaud them. " For the record, I am also man enough to admit when Goldberg is wrong.

Ding Dong the Witch is Dead.
Former WWF and WCW head writer, Vince Russo, had been on tour in Australia with WWA. Russo had been acting as producer, but that honor will now go to Jeremy Borash, because Russo has quit. Sources say that he has cut all ties with the tour due to personal and professional reasons. Also, it is rumored that after Russo's contract with Time Warner/WCW expires next Wednesday, he will be officially retired from the professional wrestling business. All I want for Christmas is for this news to be true.

Steve Cornio Retires
Russo isn't the only one packing up his ring attire, current NWA champion and former ECW World Heavyweight, Steve Corino, has announced plans to retire beginning this November. "Its not fun anymore....20 minutes into my match in Winnipeg on Sunday I looked around and said 'there is nothing left to do.' My 15 minutes are up and now it is becoming a job to me…I have decided to retire to pursue other interests. I feel like I have done everything I ever dreamed about doing and I am out of goals. It is not fun anymore." Best of luck to the "King of Old School."

Benoit Saturday
Chris Benoit will make his first WWF TV appearance since June's King of the Ring PPV when he appears on WWF Sunday Night Heat on MTV. You ever wish that the WWF would sign Balls Mahoney to a contract just so they could team him with Chris Benoit?

Billy Kidman Reinjured?
Former light heavyweight champion Billy Kidman has been working with Ohio Valley Wrestling to get back in shape from a knee injury before his return to the WWF. In a tv taping match with Rob Conway Wednesday, Kidman apparently re-injured his knee after Conway reversed a Kidman move into a neckbreaker. Kidman has a history of knee problems. If this reinjury causes Kidman to miss another few months of wrestling, I see no reason why the WWF shouldn't let him go.

The Little Things or What's Wrong with the WWF
When WCW rose to power with the NWO angle, they did so because their main plot line of the NOW invasion was interesting. One of the things that led to the eventual downfall of WCW was that they were never very good at doing the little things right. Matches always ended by disqualification or outside interference. WCW continued to push unpopular wrestlers. Plot lines made little sense and often had huge holes in them. The undercard wrestlers never had reasons to feud, but were rather just throw in the ring and given 10 minutes to wrestle. Eventually Vince Russo took over and Russo gave us lame comedy skits, unrealistic plot lines, stupid gimmicks and basically insulted the intelligence of wrestling fans (no, that was not an oxy moron.) The WWF always had the advantage of doing the little things right over WCW even when their roster had been stripped of most of it's talent and they were on the brink of folding.

Now we're in 2001, WCW is no longer the competition and the WWF has the most talented pool of wrestlers ever. So, why for the first time in my life do I find myself bored with wrestling? It's the little things. No, the WWF isn't as bad as WCW ever was, but they make a lot of the same mistakes. Matches don't end cleanly. They have lost that magic formula on how to get a wrestler over with the crowd. We waste minute after minute of television time watching lame skits, ridiculously long ring entrances, replays of things we just saw. Remember in the 80s how most of the WWF television shows would end with a cliff hanger so you'd tune in next time to see what happened? Now we get 15 minute overruns every Monday night. Remember when the rules stated that when a title belt changed hands, the loser got an automatic rematch? Now Shane McMahon has to tell us that it's in Stone Cold's contract that he gets a rematch. Remember when you'd read about what happened after Raw went off the air? The WWF would always send the fans home happy by doing something cheesy like having the good referees lay the Smackdown on the heel referees? Now we have to watch that crap on Smackdown. Why is it that we only ever see who the number one contender is? Who are contenders two through nine? Gosh, I bet it would sure be interesting to see wrestlers fight over contender placement rather than "you stole my girlfriend and made her a superhero!" I'm really not asking for much. I'm just asking for little things.

Catch my little thing on Monday.