Every Tuesday and Friday we give you the scoop on what's happening in and out of the wrestling ring. Every Monday a brand new Book It.

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Chairshots
4-19-02

Kane Update
As reported on Tuesday in Chairshots, Kane is out with a torn bicep injury. WWF.com reports that he tore his right biceps while training last Sunday and will be out of action three to four months. Jim Ross was quoted as saying, "This is a very unfortunate injury to one of our most valuable talents. Timing is never good, but this injury occurring so close from the brand extension will be challenging for us. Kane's surgery went very well and he is expected to be back at 100 percent in four months, as the entire biceps was torn."

I agree. Another Book It gone to crap.

The Dynamic Dude!
Shane Douglas will return to action after a long absence for a start up wrestling group, Major League Wrestling. Douglas' first match back will at the old ECW arena, the Viking Hall, on June 15th. He will be part of an eight-man tourney to determine the first-ever MLW Champion.

Ruling Movies and TV

Isn't Rock in This Movie?
The Scorpion King opens today on 4,904 screens in 3,443 theaters across North America. In case you missed the avalanche of publicity, it stars The Rock. You can read the Fanboyplanet.com review by clicking on these colored words.

Ratings
Last night's Smackdown finished with a 3.8 rating. That is up from a 3.5 last week. Last week's edition of Heat scored a 1.2 cable rating. That is down from its recent average. Thursday's edition of Tough Enough scored a 1.9 cable rating. Last Saturday's Excess scored a 0.9 rating. I honestly think I've seen more editions of WWF Metal than I have of Excess.

The Rock hosted Saturday Night Live last week. The show attracted 9.4 million viewers overall, scoring a 5.1 rating for the 18-49 demographic and a 5.3 rating for the 18-34 demographic. That is the biggest rating SNL has had in a long time. To read my review of the show, go read Tuesday's column.

In other Fanboy news, The Osbournes scored a 4.1 cable rating.

She's Not Hardcore!

Tammy "Sunny" Sytch

Former ECW star Dawn Marie injured her ankle this past weekend at a WWF house show. She was scheduled to wrestle a dark match at the Smackdown taping on Tuesday but it had to be cancelled due to her injury. It isn't known right now how long she will be out. She recently signed a developmental deal with the WWF, which you already ready knew because I told you.

She's Hardcore!
Tammy "Sunny" Sytch will apparently be doing a porno movie soon. She will be a guest on the Mancow radio show on Friday to promote the movie, which is being made by the same people who did her WrestlingVixxxens website. Rent must be due. Tammy isn't in the best of shape anymore as drugs and age have not been kind to her. It's a shame, as she got me through many a lonely night.

Wahoo McDaniels

Adios Kemosabe
Legendary wrestler Wahoo McDaniel passed away last night as the result of a stroke. McDaniel had spent the last ten days in a Houston hospital after complaining of not feeling well. A top box office attraction of the 60's and 70's, McDaniel was one of the most successful wrestlers to ever make the transition from professional football (Miami Dolphins) to the world of wrestling. Wahoo retired in 1989 as a multi Tag Team and US champion for NWA. As a bonus, he was one of three wrestlers my father can actually name.

Backlash Predictions
One downside to having split shows is that come Friday I can't remember the matches that are booked for the pay-per-view by Raw. Damn my MTV generation attention span and Diet Coke withered brain. (Goes to WWF.com.) Ok, I remember now.

Spike Dudley vs. William Regal
European Championship
I don't really care who wins and I suspect you don't either. Are you even reading this paragraph? Why don't you just skip to the next one and we'll pretend this match is going to take place on Jakked where it belongs. Regal wins.

Brock Lesnar vs. Matt Hardy
Anyone that picks Matt Hardy over Brock Lesnar in Lesnar's debut match is an idiot. Need more be said? Heyman will be slapped by Lita and Lesnar will quickly consume her.

Kurt Angle vs. Edge
There is a lot of history between these two and it's time someone finally won. Kurt Angle is the bigger star so he should win, but Edge needs a big win if his singles push is ever going to go anywhere. Angle wins.

Billy & Chuck vs. Al Snow & Maven
WWF Tag Team Championship
I like the idea of team Tough Enough but since they got the pin on Smackdown, Billy & Chuck will continue their ridiculous reign as tag champs.

Tajiri vs. Kidman
WWF Cruiserweight Championship
Kidman just won the belt so losing it would hurt his standing with the fans unless immediately after the match he had doggy sex with Torrie Wilson in the middle of the ring. The WWF writers aren't into Tajiri as much as the fans are, so Tajiri will lose. Kidman retains the belt and Torrie joins him. It would actually be better storyline wise if Torrie turned heel with Tajiri and cost Kidman the belt.

Scott Hall vs. Bradshaw
My brain tells me that Bradshaw will win. NWO members don't have a huge winning streak since arriving in the WWF and Bradshaw is long due for a singles push. That being said I pick Scott Hall to win because it's what my gut tells me.

Rob Van Dam vs. Eddie Guerrero
Intercontinental Championship
Sometimes when booking I just imagine a fight I'd like to see, storyline be damned. Guerrero vs. RVD is one of those dream matches I'd imagine. I'll guess that Eddie wins the match. If he does, then he wins his first big match back, gets the gold and the feud continues. That's all I really want.

Steve Austin vs. The Undertaker
#1 Contenders Match - Guest Referee Ric Flair
The outcome of this match sets up the next pay per view so the key to who will win is dependant on who will win the main event and vise versa. I'll just say Austin wins, Undertaker continues his feud with Flair and the loser of the main event. You'll read why Austin wins in a second.

Triple H vs. Hulk Hogan
WWF Championship
Any match with Hogan becomes a sticky political situation. On one hand Hogan jobbed to Rock at the last pay per view so Hogan is clearly willing to lose cleanly during his farewell tour, unlike the way he was in WCW. On the other hand, if Triple H wins then the next pay per view is headlined by Triple H vs. Austin or Triple H vs. Undertaker, both of which we have seen several times.

Hogan has been the more popular of the two lately but if he becomes champ then he will be on both Raw and Smackdown, meaning Hogan could become overexposed more quickly. If Triple H loses to Hogan then we're in a situation where Rock beat Hogan and Triple H didn't. Will Triple H be jealous?

In the end I think Hogan will get the win for old times sake (which is a bogus reason to do it) and he will go on to face Austin at the next pay per view (because it's what fans really want to see).

Michael Goodson