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I would never cheat on Chyna.

Chairshots
01-08-02

Raw Thoughts
It was the biggest hyped Raw of the year (easy to say that on January 7th.) For weeks, the WWF has promoted the return of Triple H. He made promotional appearances on Regis & Kelly as well as Howard Stern. The WWF wanted word of mouth of Triple H's return to bring back lost viewers and set the wrestling world on fire.

So, with all the attention on last night's Raw, did it live up to the hype? Yes and no. The final 20 minutes with Triple H were worth the wait. The crowd went nuts. The fans went nuts and we all felt like we were 10 years old again and marked out for wrestling. The downside was that if you watched the other hour and forty minutes, you might have fallen asleep and missed the whole thing.

On the biggest hyped Raw in a long time, was it a wise move for the WWF to put Chuck & Billy on the card and have Big Bossman wrestle in the main event? I doubt that kind of booking will convince casual and returning viewers that the WWF has become must see television again.

On the other hand, Terri and Trish in a wet tee shirt contest may have made everyone forget about that. I guess Test's push as a heel is over since he lost clean to Rob Van Dam. Tazz and Spike won the tag titles from the Dudleys. That's an interesting move since Spike and Tazz are basically riding on popularity they deserved a year ago, but have lately been forgettable. With the tag team situation in the WWF being what it is, I guess it's better than nothing.

Kurt Angle is the first stop on the "Triple H: Back and Kicking Ass Tour." The duo have a lot of history together, including what I always felt was a too short feud over Stephanie. Maybe now that Kurt is a heel and Triple H is a babyface they can settle that once and for all. Also, both men announced that they will be in the Royal Rumble along with Undertaker, Stone Cold and Rock. Anyone care to bet me now that Triple H won't win Royal Rumble?

Triple H on Regis
Monday should have just been named Triple H day since most of the day's news revolved around him. He made an appearance on Live with Regis and Kelly. There isn't really much in the way of highlights because most of the questions were along the intelligence of "Why are you called The Game" and "will you be a good guy or a bad guy?" If you missed it, you didn't miss much.

Triple H on Stern
On the other hand, if you missed Triple H on Howard Stern, you missed a lot. Here are the highlights:

Before the interview, Stern promoted Triple H's appearance. Stern said he is looking forward to his visit because Triple H used to have sex with Chyna and wants to know what's up with that

Stern asked Triple H about having sex with Chyna. He asked if they ever had anal sex. HHH admitted that he did. Stern asked if it was true that he had a lot of anal with her (which Chyna had implied on her last Stern show appearance). Triple H admitted that over 4 years, they had anal and Stern said that was as close to gay as it gets.

Triple H denied that he and Chyna were ever engaged (Chyna said they were).

Stern talked about Triple H dating Stephanie. He asked what would happen if Triple H and Stephanie broke up, and what Vince McMahon would do. "Vince loves his daughter a lot, but he also loves money too and would never compromise the WWF."

They asked whether Triple H was cheating on Chyna (another statement Chyna made on the show) and he said their relationship was over before he actually started with Stephanie.

Chyna found out about his relationship with Stephanie when she found love letters from her in his briefcase. (Triple H carries a briefcase? Nerd.)

Triple H had nothing bad to say about Chyna and that his relationship with her was great.

He said his relationship with Steph began professionally and they have been a real life couple for over a year but that it hasn't progressed to talk of marriage. (Liar! Women always talk about marriage!)

Both Chyna and Stephanie were/are great sexually. (Yeah baby!)

Stern asked Triple H how scared he was when he thought he wouldn't be able to return to wrestling, since wrestlers have no retirement or pension plan. Triple H said that when you make money as a wrestler, you have to be very smart with it.

Chyna's "firing" had nothing to do with him.

Triple H and Stern made fun of some guy who came in to the studio with a Triple H tattoo.

Jerry Lawler Speaks!
Jerry "The King" Lawler was a guest on Get in the Ring this week. It yielded a funny moment and one news bit. Early in the show the host announced that he was engaged. Jerry responded to the news by saying "You might as well find a broad you don't like and buy her a house and a car, save yourself the trouble." I guess he's still a little bitter about The Kat leaving him. Lawler also feels that there is a shot that "Grand Masta Sexy" Brian Christopher will return to the WWF. He knows that there was a conversation between Brian and JR several weeks ago, and thinks it is a wait and see situation. Jerry is confident that the WWF knows that Brian is a great talent, but he made a mistake (taking illegal drugs across the Canadian border) and the question is now how long do you have to pay for your mistake? I'm all for forgiving and forgetting, but do I ever really need to see Brian Christopher on my television again? I think not.

Ross Report
Jim Ross made his weekly update to WWF.com. It was slim on news but J.R. did mention that Undertaker was injured at last Thursday's Smackdown tapings. Taker's back was injured taking the Big Show's chokeslam. Undertaker could be out until the Royal Rumble, if not longer. I wonder if his return will be as heavily promoted…

Also from J.R.: the Rock will be doing re-shoots for "The Scorpion King" throughout January and into February, but should not miss TV time. The Hardys and Lita have not been "suspended," and are in good standing with the company. Chris Benoit and Tajiri will be doing promotional work in Asia for the WWF's upcoming tour over there. Dean Malenko has now started work as a road agent for the WWF. Fred Blassie could write a book this year. I'm not sure if that means he will or just Freddy still has the ability. Both Bull Buchanan and Val Venis were hyped as "ready to return to the main roster." God, that makes me so happy I could cry.

Bobby Heenan News
Some sad news this week. 1Wrestling.com is reporting that Bobby Heenan is being treated for throat cancer. "The Brain" was the best manager and color commentator the WWF has ever had. Our thoughts and good will go out to him.

See you kids Friday.

Michael Goodson