Falls Count Anywhere

09-08-06

Mmmm...cheesy.

RAW
Well, I like this episode a good deal, though there were slight issues here and there. The entire WWE planning commission is working hard at making RAW the centerpiece and that leaves SD! in a weaker position.

The tease of John Cena returning to Friday nights is a smart one and they opened the show with Edge taunting Cena from the ladder. At one point, Edge jumped off, Cena caught him and put him through a table. That was a good spot. I’m not sure what I want to happen. Cena’s a big star, but how much heat will he lose if he is tossed back to SD!?

Jeff Hardy took on Johnny Nitro. This was an OK match with Hardy working like he did early in his WWE tenure. He sold a lot and Nitro worked over his back. Before the Hardys took off, that was his role in the WWF. Nitro used one of my favorite moves: the Hot Shot.

Hardy made a great comeback and hit the Electric Chair Drop! He rolled through a Flying Bodypress attempt for a near fall, though Nitro did hit the standing Shooting Star Press. Hardy went for the Twist of Fate and Melina interfered for the DQ. Hardy got to do the Swanton afterwards. I’m of the belief that maybe Hardy is back on the right track.

Lita and Trish had a confrontation and Trish challenged Lita to one last match at Unforgiven. They brawled a little and then Carlito pulled them apart but was jumped by Randy Orton. They set up a six-person with Cena, Carlito and Trish vs. Edge, Lita and Orton.

Super Crazy and Chris Masters wrestled after Masters made an open challenge. Crazy is so good that he managed to get a watchable match out of Masters. Crazy flew all over the place and was about to get the Masterlock when Crazy escaped and hit the Moonsault for the win. That’s right, they jobbed Masters to Super Crazy. It’s the right choice, Crazy’s a great wrestler and they could really use him higher up on the card (or in ECW), but it was very unexpected. I’d say it was a sign that they’re not sold on Masters as a star in the non-steroid era.

Where's Vince's left hand?

The crowd was way into the McMahons and Big Show talking about the Hell in the Cell and getting the upper-hand on DX last week. I wasn’t as impressed with the opening as I was hoping to be because when the McMahons gloat, they usually do a good job.

In came DX with a sledge and a chair. HHH did an intense interview which was really good. He’s still got it, even if he’s out of the title picture for the time being. The security squad got cleared out by DX but that gave time for Show, Shane and Vin to hightail it out of there. Hot segment, no question.

The Highlanders beat Hass-Big Viz and Cade and Murdoch to get the title shot at the Spirit Squad at the PPV. There wasn’t much to the match, but it wasn’t bad. Just sorta laid there.

Ric Flair and Maria shared a moment while Maria was doing her KissCam thing. Flair planted one on her. Didn’t he learn anything? He’ll try and set up a date and Miss Atlanta Lively (aka Ronnie Garvin in Drag) will come out and deck him. He talked about beating folly when Armando came out and was followed by Umaga. Kane attacked Umaga and knocked him around.

OK, Crym Time has got to go. It wasn’t terribly offensive, but it was bad and I can see that they’ll get a lot of anger for it. It was Wayans Bros humor at its worst.

The Main Event six-person was a really good, really dramatic match that I think went off better than it would have a year ago. Theodore R. Long was in the audience hoping to get Cena back for SmackDown!. Cena started and he’s really getting better. He’ll never be Bret Hart, but we could see him develop into a DDP-type wrestler.

There were a lot of trade-offs with guys coming in and out and making impacts left and right. It had a very Mexican flavor to it. There was a great section where Carlito played Face in Peril while Edge and Orton tagged in and out constantly.

Eventually Cena made it into the ring and they cleaned house. Trish managed to hit Stratusfaction on Lita and went for the Chick Kick. Edge was about to Spear Trish when Carlito made the save. Randy hit an RKO on Trish instead and Lita got the pin. That was a great ending sequence, especially with some excellent camera work that allowed the Orton RKO to come out of nowhere!

Really strong show. Just great stuff.

NEWS
The Wrestling Observer released their new additions to the Hall of Fame this week and there weren’t no major surprises. Paul Bowser, a legendary promoter, got in via the Old Timers committee. Japan’s Hiroshi Hase, one of the most successful wrestlers turned politicians ever, made the cut. Aja Kong, who only wrestled in the US a few times but was one of the greatest female wrestlers of the 1990s, also got in. I’m pleased to say that Eddy Guerrero also made it in, which was almost a forgone conclusion. He was a great performer and a big draw towards the end of his life.

Bobby Eaton, one of the great in-ring performers and tag teamers of the 1980s, had a heart attack this week. He’s expected to recover but there’s no time table. He was half of various versions of The Midnight Express and won three awards for Tag Team of the Year in the Observer polls, as well as four awards for most underrated. He’s one of the good guys from that era.

Anybody want to check Ariel for a serpent's tongue?

ECW
I didn’t see all of ECW, but I did see Sabu and Van Dam beat Test and Mike Knox. That’s the first move that ECW has done to take the real ECWers and put them over the interlopers. While the match had some nice moments (Test going for a Press Slam and RVD just flat kicking him in the face!), it wasn’t the prettiest match you’ll ever see. There was a lot of table breaking, which hasn’t been used nearly enough to get ECW over. Sabu hit the Triple Jump Moonsault but didn’t get the pin. It was Stereo Legdrops through the Table that finally got them the win. Sabu and RVD are probably better used as singles, but it’s good to see them together again once in a while.

I caught a bit of Ariel coming on to Joey Styles while Kevin Thorn was watching the Balls Mahoney match. She’s wicked hot. I mean unnaturally hot in a way that makes me worry that she may actually be some sort of demon.

Other than those two segments, I saw a bit of the DX vs. Big Show match and have to say they need to get the belt off of Show and let ECW sink or swim on its own. There’s no way it can continue to be successful while really simply being another RAW showcase (or SmackDown! as the case my be). I just want an ECW back that is at least slightly ECW-like.

That’s all for this week. I’ll be back with more on Monday!

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Chris Garcia