Welcome to Falls
Count Anywhere! My name is Chris and TNA has to be considered
am the slut of the century.
Better RAW than last week with some nice surprises and a
few good angles.
Cena started things out. The reaction to him is great and
the RAW audience seems to have taken to him as much, if
not more, than the SD! audience did. It’ll be interesting
to see how RAW does after Batista leaves as the final draft
Hassan comes out and Cena challenges him to a match after
saying that Hassan’s biscuit has gone stale; that
is to say, his bit is old. Bischoff came out and said that
the match is for the title, which is cool. Bisch stayed
in the ring and called out Shelton Benjamin. Eric pointed
out that Shelton was the longest reigning Intercontinental
Champ in ten years, which I don’t think is correct.
I seem to remember someone (Owen Hart?) holding it longer.
He said that when Shelton won the belt, Jericho had no idea
who was going to challenge him. Benjamin caught on and said
for Bischoff to bring out whoever it was and it turned out
to be Carlito! The crowd gave him a good reaction.
The match between
Carlito and Benjamin was really good. They went back forth,
with Shelton doing a Northern Lights Suplex, but he missed
a Stinger Splash. Carlito worked harder than he has since
he came back from his injury and he hit a DDT. Shelton landed
almost on his head going for a dive. It was sweet! Carlito
rolled through and got the pin to win the title. They said
that this was the same way that Carlito won the US title
on SmackDown! last year. Good point. He later spit apple
on Maria. Sweet.
Graham was there!
Simon Dean. He also did that spot he did to Coach last week.
Oh sweet Jesus why are we being exposed to this? Is Eric
Embry writing RAW now?
Jericho had a little thing backstage where Jericho complained
Hassan was getting the shot at Cena. Christian said that
Hassan had been over-looked like he had been and then said
that Cena and Jericho AND their albums all sucked. Nice
and Bischoff had a chat where Kurt said that he was going
to dedicate his win over Shawn Michaels at Vengeance to
Bisch. Aw, young love.
Wedding between Lita and Edge was absolutely hilarious.
Lita came out in the World’s Sluttiest Wedding Dress
and Gene Snitsky came out and read a poem in his modified
Tux. They read these vows:
Lita, everyone knows me as money in the bank, and now you
know me as money in the sack. And I know you had rough time
because of Kane, you’ll be with a man, not a monster.
Lita- Edge, I may have been unlucky in marriage, but I have
been lucky in love. I never loved Kane, and after falling
in love, I know I have NEVER been in love with any man.
I don’t care what these people say, but if falling
in love with you makes me a slut, then I am proud to be
the slut of the century!
I was dying at
they asked if anyone objected, Edge played a Matt Hardy
Video! Holy Crap, that was ballsy. Kane came out and Lita
and Edge ran off, so Kane gave the preacher the Tombstone.
Nice touch. The crowd hated this, which is sad.
In what I thought
was the angle of the night, Christy was giving an interview
about cracking last week and beating on Victoria. She called
Victoria a bitch and a little later, Victoria came from
behind and broke a glass pitcher over Christy’s head,
and said ‘You’re right, I am a bitch’
which got a good pop from the crowd. I love Victoria. Christy
was KOed, and they even used some fake blood to sell it.
They had the EMTs asking her questions and such after they
took a commercial break.
John Cena destroyed
Muhammad Hassan in a quick match to end his undefeated streak.
It wasn’t much of a match, but Cena looked good, which
is what really matters.
They showed the
8 Diva Search contestants and they aren’t too promising.
One or two seem to have a lot of personality, and there
was one from Austria who had a hot bod but dear God, why
do they let her talk? I already have my favorite.
Kurt Angle and
Batista had a match that ended after about two minutes when
Flair and HHH came out and attacked Batista. Shawn Michaels
came out and evened the score. Lillian announced the winner,
but Eric Bischoff announced that that wasn’t how it
was going to end and he ordered a Tag Team match between
Batista and HBK vs. Angle and HHH. This match was better,
with a lot of great storyline stuff going on. Angle gave
Michaels an STF and his leg was way up there. Lot’s
of good work here with HBK looking like the star he is.
The crowd kinda died leading into this one, but picked up
towards the end. The finish was Batista giving Flair the
Spinebuster, but he walked right into the Pedigree that
gave HHH the win. H draped the belt over Batista and talked
I liked this
episode and other than the Viz stuff, I can’t really
The ECW PPV continues to be talked about. There’s
a lot of talk about starting a touring version, and there’s
also a lot of talk about Vince signing some of the guys
from the PPV, most notably Sabu, who met with Vince before
RAW this week. Psicosis, Juventud (who was an old ECW guy
but didn’t do the PPV), Super Crazy and Kid Kash all
had matches either on Velocity or Dark Matches. There was
also talk about bringing in Balls Mahoney (with a new name)
and Axl Rotten so that the Dudleys could have a feud with
Dudleys are another interesting point. They are still on
contract and they are in great shape for the first time
in ages, but creative has nothing for them so they aren’t
on TV. WHAT THE HELL?!?!?! These two could revitalize the
Tag Team division on either show. Hell, even putting them
in a feud with MNM would be a sweet series. If more ECW
guys are signed, I’m betting we’ll see them
back in WWE rings.
they’ve managed to kill another champion. After TNA
took a bold leap forward, they took a big step back with
started by announcing that Jeff Jarrett is out of the main
event and that Raven is taking his place. This one action
let me know three things: first, Jeff Jarrett is getting
the belt back muy quickly, that Raven was going to win the
NWA Title in the Main Event and that I officially hate TNA’s
with a big X-Division match with The Amazing Red, Elix Skipper,
The Oh-So-Litigious Shark Boy, Delirious, the One-Legged
Marvel Zach Gowen and Jerrelle Clark. This was a fun match
and it moved at high speeds. I’ve always like just
about everyone in this match, but this was a spotfest with
lots of fun timing and far too short for my tastes. They
did a lot of great stuff, including Amazing Red doing a
Corkscrew Infared to the outside and a GORGEOUS springboard
moonsault from our pal Shark Boy. A Shooting Star Press
showed up, and there was a great piledriver that made me
cringe. Shark Boy ended up with the win, which may be because
he’s been getting a lot of press from the lawsuit.
who has become a favorite of internet types and I admit
I like him too, had a bad match with Shocker. This was Bad
Lucha, which is worse than anything, where timing seemed
to be off. Shelley and Shocker are both very good, but here
they just didn’t mesh. I know I’m in the minority,
but I’d like to see Shocker working on top of the
card as a contender for the NWA title.
Outlaw (That’s Mr. Billy Gunn-Ass for those of us
who watched the WWF back in the day) took on Ron Killings.
This is the way you can kill a PPV. Killings is a talented
wrestler, but Outlaw treated him like a jobber. Even when
he sold for him, it was like he was doing it out of obligation
not so that the match would look good. At that point, I
knew the show would be a failure, but I thought that it
might be able to succeed with a great main event. Killings
managed to reverse out of a Cobra Clutch Slam to get a rool-up
for the win. I really didn’t think that Outlaw wanted
to do the job and he just buried Killings with his lame
The NWA Tag Team
Titles were on the line between Team Canada and The Naturals.
This was a really good match with both teams working a very
smart style. They started with back and forth, which they
are both great at. At one point, Team Canada had Stevens
in The Tree of Woe and Williams stepped on his Crotch as
he climbed to the top and sang the Canadian National Anthem.
I love bits like that. The match moved really well, with
Petey Williams taking a Hart Attack off the Naturals. I
always loved that move. The finish was A-1, who was with
Team Canada, hit Stevens with a Hockey Stick. Jimmy Hart
came out and gave Stevens the megaphone, which he used to
get the win. Nice ending to a fun match and the first one
that really got enough time!
Samoa Joe came
to TNA and took on Sonjay Dutt. I really like Dutt and Joe
is awesome. It was a very good match with the two of them
really working well together. Joe worked his knees and kicks
really well. It’s hard to believe that the WWE hasn’t
made a serious play to him because he’s great and
has a legit style that is very much influenced by guys like
Tazz and Perry Saturn. Dutt got some good offense, including
an enzuigiri and a nice Plancha. He brought Joe back into
the ring and hit a 450 press, but went up for the Hindu
Press. He didn’t hit it and that allowed Joe to get
the chokeout for the win. Good match and I’m glad
to see Samoa Joe on a bigger stage.
Bobby Roode beat
Lance Hoyt in a match that I kinda liked. I liked Hoyt’s
crews’ t-shirts that said Hoyt-a-mania, which I do
believe is running wild. Hoyt used all sorts of power moves,
like Chokeslams and the running boot that all the big guys
use. Roode hit a powerbomb for a two count after Hoyt set
up on the top for a moonsault. Eventually, Scott D’Amour
interfered and missed a moonsault on to Hoyt and later got
chokeslammed. Hoyt hit a moonsault on Scott. Roode won with
the Northern Lariet (Reverse Clothesline) for the pin.
I missed America’s
Most Wanted vs. 3 Live Cru due to some black box…I
mean completely legal cable box troubles. I understand that
AMW won with their Hart Attack-like finisher. I’m
told this was an average match.
great three-way, which started just after we got fuzzy B+W
picture back, Fallen Angel Christopher Daniels, who is almost
40 I believe, took beat from Michael Shane and The Future
Chris Sabin. This was a good match and I’m so glad
the picture got better and better as it went on. Daniels
got a submission move on early, but it got broken up by
a top rope elbow by Shane. Shane and Daniels work really
well together and they did a lot of back and forth. They
did a great series where Daniels blocked a Superkick and
Shane escaped from an Angels Wings which allowed Sabin to
get the Enzuigiri on Daniels and a DDT on Shane! Daniels
managed to pin Sabin with The Angel Wings for the pin. Good
A brief outage
was followed by perfect picture for the main event. I will
say this: I wish I had missed it. It was a good match. In
fact, it might have been the best NWA Title match in a good
long while. I thought it was better than AJ Styles vs. Jeff
Jarrett last month. It was terribly booked and will certainly
hurt TNA. It was those weird King of the Mountain rules
where you have to hang the belt and there’s a penalty
box and everything. It was with AJ Styles, Raven, Monty
Brown, Sean Waltman, and Abyss. Monty was the first one
to get a pin, as he pinned Raven with a Pounce that sent
Raven to the Penalty Box. I hate that part. The match continued
and was going great, looking like we were gonna get Styles
winning the match with a good battle where he overcame the
odds. Brown Pounced Styles, which allowed Raven to get the
pin on the floor to become eligible to win the match. In
the only sick spot, Waltman crotch-stapled both Raven and
Abyss. Wow. Everyone was trying to be the guy who hung the
belt, but in the end, it was RAVEN.
right, Raven won the NWA title.
saying that Raven isn’t a great guy, a team player
and one who should be champion, but not now. They had a
chance to build AJ into a real star, one who could work
and who could start to draw with his style, but no, they
give it to Raven. The reason is likely because of the ECW
ga-ga that’s hit wrestling of late and Raven was a
big part of ECW. Or maybe it was because they have no faith
in Styles because he’s not great at promos. Or maybe
it’s because they can get it off Raven and back on
to Jarrett with a convenient storyline that they wrote at
the beginning of the show with Raven taking Jarrett’s
place. That last one sounds too much like the truth of the
this was an average PPV with a few good match and a lot
of bad booking. I’m kinda glad TNA doesn’t have
TV right now, because it’s probably best that it die
soon so that someone else with an idea of how to book a
real fed can come up.
all for today. More on Friday.
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